FFFFFF.

Oh god what.

So, I was taking a little break from TF2, and when I returned to my usual few-hours-a-night schedule, I found myself sucking. Quite horribly.
Until tonight. Christ. For the record, I've been drinking again. Decided to play a bit, because you've probably noticed how I have almost a habit of getting wasted and then wasting the entire evening just fragging people and being amused at how I'm not that bad of a player when I'm drunk (and yes, I am very aware of the fact that I am indeed a gigantic nerd and have no life).
So yeah, I was playing as Heavy on Gold Rush and being once again surprisingly good at it (especially after last night's failfest. I don't wanna talk about it).

But then I switched servers and found myself on Dustbowl. Stage Two. RED. First point had been capped, so my team had already fell back to the last point. I went Medic, seeing that they didn't have any Medics, and started healing.

Result?

1. Within two minutes I was on top of the scoreboard, above all the players who had been on the server before me.

2. Intern. 500 FUCKING HP AWAY FROM SPECIALIST FFFFF I'M PISSED (Most health healed record is now 9,498 FFFFF I STILL GET PISSED OFF WHEN I LOOK AT IT. SO CLOSE. SO. CLOSE).

3. And most points record, 24, whoo!

And the best (/most fucked-up) part? At some point after I had launched my second über I started getting 1-5 fps. I'm not shitting you. I was getting some serious lag and I don't know if it was the server or my connection. And still I managed to get two more übers and stay alive until BLU capped the point.
I stuck around for a few minutes on third stage, but at that point the lag was getting so ridiculous I had to stop. Much to my chagrin. Stupid lag, I was doing so good!
And at that point half the team was going Medic and stealing my Heavy, so it was completely my cue to leave. What the hell is it with those people: no one wants to be a Medic in the previous round, then I jump in and dominate the scoreboard and then everyone else wants to be Medic too?
I completely understood when few people went Medic after I went all "LOL GUYS I'M GETTING LIKE 1 FPS MAYBE I SHOULD STOP" in chat, though. But I'm drunk, you don't have an excuse.

And here, scoreboard at the start of stage three:



But yeah, it's nice to know that I'm still a fucking kickass Medic even when slightly drunk and with the lowest framerate possible. HA HA HA I really hope that won't happen ever again. I was insane to stick around after I started lagging.