Wb, me!

Guess who's back in the game.



And as you can see, the new PC handles L4D pretty nicely, the resolution alone is pretty insane (yes, I am playing with 1280x1024 and near-highest graphics settings, and it runs as smoothly as it possibly can). For now I'd say getting this PC was worth the while.
L4D seems to be pretty light either way, back when I played the Demo on my old PC, the game actually ran pretty nicely. I mean, I wasn't even playing on the lowest graphics settings - at least texture detail was high - but my resolution was 640 x 480 (this is how it looked, yay PSOne graphics ftw!), and I got all the lighting effects, and actually a pretty decent FPS. And I had been quite sure that the computer would refuse to run it in the first place.

So how about Team Fortress 2?
FPS stays on green almost in every situation (saw it flicker in yellow when there was dozens of stuff on the screen at once), and I get about the same graphics as I did playing on little brother's computer last summer.
So all in all? I'm pretty much extremely satisfied.

I have much to do, organizing files, installing stuff and so forth, so I'll leave a more in-depth entry about Left 4 Dead for later, for now I'll just say that I love versus. I got to play some bits of the co-op campaign on a friend's PC last week after the game came out, so I was somewhat familiar with it, and last night the first thing we did after I got the game, was to find a server and play some versus. I had played it once before, and the game whined to me about needing to play the campaign first, but I didn't really care.
And yes yes the best part about versus is getting to play as the Infected. The best part about playing as the Infected is spawning as the Tank. Okay, yeah, I can't really say since I was a Tank for about ten seconds last night. I spawned at the end of No Mercy just as the Survivors were stumbling to the evac helicopter. I managed to incap one of them, though, so job well done, and only one escaped alive, as rest of my Infected buddies managed to pin the others down. (Yeah, I'm the Tank in the screenshot I posted.)
I like being other Infected as well, Smoker's probably my favourite since you don't have to go get so intimate with the Survivors as the Smoker. I like lurking about rooftops. Hunter's fun as well, although I seem to be just horrible at aiming my jumps, haha. But I've had my best ownage moments as a Hunter pinning down a lone Survivor while others are being harrassed by a Boomer and subsequently a horde. Oh, love. Boomer's surprisingly fun as well.

What sucks about versus is the crazy console-reminiscent lobby system that absolutely sucks because you don't know what kind of ping you'll have until you're actually in game. So it's mostly just jumping from one server to another until one with not-as-crazy latency comes along.
Or since I usually have at least three buddies to play with at any given time, we make a server of our own and then search for a dedicated one, which seems to work pretty well. We get nice ping, and the server usually fills up quickly.
And then we get our fair share of idiots: one of my buddies was playing versus for the first time last night, so of course one of our team-mates started whining at him that he sucks, but. Me and Slaver kindly told him to stfu, and he still had the nerve to start a votekick against my friend. Which backfired royally, because after that there was a vote to kick the whiner, which - needless to say - passed 3 to 1.
I can only imagine how much he must've been raging, hee hee.
But just what the fucking hell, you choose a random public server and then start whining about the noobs? Besides, dear idiot, you weren't doing too hot either (I was kicking your ass in scores and I was playing for the second time), so please do take a look in the mirror before mouthing off a "noob."
Yeah yeah, I know, the whole teamwork thing, of course it sucks if someone on your team seems to be lost, but ffs you can still treat the player nicely and try to understand that the game's been out for a week and not everyone can be fucking brilliant at it already.

But yeah, it's like fighting windmills, fighting these idiots in online multiplayer communities.

You are a loose cannon sandvich, but you are a damn good cop!

Lookie what I've got!



It did take a bit long (I've been mainly playing as a Heavy for a few nights now), but as you probably know, I'm not that good a Heavy. All thanks to Sonneteer who kept sticking to my ass (even when I'm munching away on my sandvich in respawn and while THE CART IS NEARING THE CHECKPOINT... yeah, I didn't notice anything, enthralled by my brand new beautiful sandvich, but apparently Sonny kept laughing until we got out: yeah, the cart is moving and I'm camping in respawn, all JUST ONE SANDVICH YOU GUYS THEN WE CAN GO) and helping me to get several of the achievements.
And having a darling Medic running to me with a full charge when I'm getting out of respawn after getting headshot... gotta love it.

And for fuck's sake, if a mediocre Heavy like me can get a bunch of achievements in a few hours, playing just like I normally would, anyone can. I understand if you want the unlockables NOW NOW RIGHT NOW I CAN'T WAIT, go ahead and farm, none of my business, but I fucking hate it when people whine about the achievements being too hard. And yeah, the idiots who come to a non-achievement-grinding server and run around boxing or trying to taunt... well, they're idiots. And they deserve their bans.
But it's possible to get most of the achievements - the 20 required for the unlockables - in regular gameplay without acting like an idiot. Why don't people understand that?
And yeah, I'm probably the only person who finds getting the achievements fun: farming them would take all the fun out of it. I don't even mind the unlockables being tied to the achievements. I don't mind that I don't have them from the get-go. Because getting them is not impossible.
Sure, getting the Spy unlockables would be impossible for me, but I don't play as the Spy, what the hell would I do with the Spy unlockables?
Jesus Christ, people are idiots.
Newsflash.

Besides, I'm learning some new tricks all the time while playing, and I don't think I've ever been a complete drag to my team while insisting to play as Heavy to get the achievements (and today I was an MVP several times, so it could be that in fact I might be even somewhat useful and learning something! Le gasp!). Sure I would be doing better as a Soldier or Medic or even a Demo, but hey, you can't expect to get better at playing as a certain class if you never actually play as that class.
So I'm slowly learning. And getting the achievements while I'm at it.

So, the Sandvich? Well now I know what I'll be doing during all the setups from now on. OM NOM NOMing away. I forget to use it in battle, and this far I've consumed a grand total of one sandvich when I actually needed some health. It's pretty useful, gotta admit. Especially since all Medics (except Sonny) hate me.
And it's pretty horrible to run out of Sasha ammo while you have the Sandvich equipped. Not that I've ever even killed anyone with the shotgun, but I feel much safer running to the closest ammo crate when I'm holding a boomstick INSTEAD OF FISTS. And running out of ammo while übered? Yeah, that's a whole different nightmare.
Also, I want to be able to hit people with the Sandvich! Come on, it would be epic!

And I'm probably getting Natascha after a few matches: while I don't have that many achievements yet, I have several that are just missing a few kills/captures/whatever. Party Loyalty is 46/50, Factory Worker 14/20, Soviet Union about 20/25... Pushkin the Cart, Lenin a Hand and Purge I'm also getting pretty soon.
And, yeah, I have (in addition to the five I already mentioned in some earlier post) Class Struggle, Stalin the Cart, Supreme Soviet, Own the Means of Production, Crock Block and Five Second Plan. And the first Milestone. So, four achievements and then Natasha will be mine.

I also have a new-found respect for Snipers. Because as a Heavy? Fuck I hate them.
I never thought I'd want a team with more than one Sniper, but the final checkpoint on Gold Rush? Yeah, I kinda wanted half of my team to go Sniper just to keep the three ominous figures standing there on the balcony in check, so that I could peek around the freaking corner without getting a bullet between my eyes.
Stupid fucking Snipers.

And today marks the first time ever, when as a Demoman, I didn't panic or get nervous at all when I was übered. We're on Dustbowl, attacking, the third stage just started, and a Medic with a full charge sticks to me right out of the blue, informing via voicechat that Chrome, we're now going to take down the sentries.
So I was like "OKAY!" and went there, and took the sentries out, all cool and calm and collected, and then we rushed the second point and won within fifteen seconds, I think. MVP, bitches.
That was awesome.
I've been playing a lot as a Demo, too, since Badwater is hella awesome for causing some serious sticky havoc. I'm even starting to like being an offensive Demo: I usually played Demo more on defense, since it's easy to just lay down the stickies on the point and camp nearby. Now I find myself going Demo on offense too, since I don't have to lay my stickies anywhere and I can use them as remote-controlled regular 'nades and I'm getting better at using them like that. THE MAYHEM. IT IS SWEET.

And now I'm forced to take a little tiny break from playing: real life insists on interfering. But at least from next week onward I'll be sharing an apartment with another TF2 player, and we'll just see how deadly a pair me and Slaverstrike can make once we can actually communicate. That is, yell from one room to another. I'm definitely looking forward to it, haha.

Lots of raeg. Again.

ILU VALVE.

Removed health bonus from the Backburner

Finally. The days of overpowered kamikaze Pyros are finally over, I hope. Maybe they'll finally go back to ambushing. And finally I can go back to playing the Soldier! And yes, Backburner Pyros were the number one reason for why I haven't played much as the Soldier since the Pyro update. They were just goddamn impossible to kill with their ridiculous amount of health and I got so frustrated with them.

And the following updates and changes also make me happy:

Added a gear symbol behind the health bar for Engineer buildings, in both target IDs and freeze panels

Players killing themselves will now give a kill credit to the last enemy who damaged them

Because as a Medic I'm constantly checking everyone's health and it annoys me to hover over a bunch of people, see someone with low health and rush in only to find out that it was a damaged dispenser or something.
And now I won't feel so bad about suiciding as a Demo or a Soldier anymore. Except when I'm feeling like an asshole and the guy who almost killed me before I suicided is someone who's dominating me or otherwise being a total dick to me and I wouldn't want to give him any credit for getting the kill.

Now I'll just settle down to wait for the inevitable Demoman sticky nerf and the Heavy update.

And then back to out usual schedule of wanton babbling:
I was once again playing on a HK's Newbies Only server last night and it seemed like it was an Official Butthurt Day, because people were complaining about something, all the fucking time.
First someone complained about Demomen being overpowered for half a round on Gravel Pit. I was on RED, the whiner was on BLU, and there were two Demos on our team, me being one of them. I wasn't doing very good: I was close to the top of the scoreboard, I think, but I didn't have very much kills or anything, and at least I felt like I wasn't doing very good (which can be taken any way you want to, since I'm known to own everyone and still feel like I suck, so). Anyway, this guy, he kept on complaining about stickies, how even Valve calls them "winbombs" (old fucking news, dude, change the record), how they're ridiculously OP and how Demomen are cheap cheap cheap.
Christ, I raged.
I admit it, stickies are a bit overpowered, and they will be nerfed in some way or the other sooner or later (maybe they'll prolong the time in which a just-fired sticky can be detonated, or maybe they'll do a damage reduction, or no crits...), but they are not impossible to deal with! I get so angry whenever someone complains about stickies, because it's your own fucking fault if you step on them! What the fuck were you expecting, a simple flesh wound?!
Here, let Auntie Chrome a.k.a. Captain Obvious give you a little lesson on stickies and How To Deal With Them.

Good Demomen of course hide their stickies to their best abilities, putting them to the ceiling or around blind corners, but if there's a very visible sticky carpet on a point, on a chokepoint or in a doorway, why the hell would you stand on them?! You either find another way, try to deal with the Demo (who's undoubtedly somewhere near because he usually has a clear line of sight at his bombs, unless the stickies are on a point, in which case the Demo can be anywhere, because the HUD is all he needs to defend), or simply try to scatter the stickies, which makes them less deadly. One sticky kills weaker classes, but with the ones with higher HP just one doesn't do the trick (unless it's a crit, but that goes without saying. And in stickies' case you can see the crits, so you're a complete fucking idiot if you go near one). So if the stickies are scattered all over the place, they're not nearly as potent. Or you can be The Good Guy and sacrifice yourself for the greater good, ie. your team's cause: walk on the stickies, the Demo detonates and kills you, but the rest of your team are now free to charge the bastard, and he has no time to set his stickies back up. Unless he's very good. But yeah, hardly anyone ever thinks about the Team, at least not on pubs.
Or waste an über to take the Demo down. Stickies send charged people flying (best defense on Dustbowl stage three: just sticky the only way to the first point and detonate when the übered enemies try to charge in and take down sentries. Works every damn time, and people just don't pay enough attention to stickies when they're übered. Which is probably why people whine about them. Dammit, stop being so ignorant and do something about the stickies!), but in case it's a narrow hallway with a low ceiling, it's not like you'll fly anywhere.
Easiest way of course is to find a way around the stickies. If a Demoman is camping some doorway, just go around it, get behind him and hand him his butt. Scouts and Pyros work wonders, Scouts especially tend to be preeetty tedious (my damn nemesis class as a Demo, no, I'm not kidding. I hate good Scouts, can't hit them for the life of me and then they just bonk me to death. But that's how it is, Demos are weak against Scouts, it's part of the game balance, and I'm admittably not that good a Demoman, as you probably know). If there are Demos camping every damn doorway, well, then, maybe you're screwed. Or maybe you should, I don't know, be another Demoman, a Soldier, maybe a Pyro?
Because silly Pyros, so enamoured by the now-nerfed Backburner that they don't realise the awesomeness that is the regular flamethrower and its all-powerful airburst. Airburst scatters stickies very easily and makes a well-planned-out sticky carpet considerably weaker or downright useless (I don't understand why people still insist on standing on Dustbowl's second stage's last cap while it's thoroughly stickied. One airburst, a rocket, or setting of your own sticky clears the point and I rarely ever see anyone do it! Which is why I usually own as a defending Demo on Dustbowl). As a Demoman you hold one of the best weapons against stickies: stickies. Just fire one or two in the middle of the carpet, set them off and poof they roll into every direction, clearing way. I've seen Heavies clear sticky carpets pretty effectively. Shotgun works with lonely stickies, but against a carpet... I'd suggest you go find the nearest Pyro.
So for fuck's sake, the stickies are not all-powerful, not even in the hands of the world's best Demoman! Just learn to deal with them and you make many career Demomen cry in frustration! Although I'm quite sure that good (career) Demos don't really do sticky camping, since stickies are even more frightening when used like any other projectile (which is why I think that the "prolong the time in which a just-fired sticky can be detonated" nerf would be perfect and force Demos to do sticky camping, which is arguably easier to deal with - like I've just shown you - than those crazy sticky-chucking harbingers of carnage and destruction).

I have spoken.

Now back to my Official Butthurt Day story. So the guy was whining about Demos being overpowered, and I remember at some point I got a Medic with a full charge sticking to me and we went to demolish a sentry nest that the enemy had got up in the hallways leading from A to C.
And in a moment the guy said "There are the cheap Demos again. RED is so cheap."
So you think that an übered, somewhat skilled Demoman shouldn't be able to clear a sentry nest and kill half a team that's obliviously camping a narrow hallway? Really now? Butthurt much? Maybe we should just sit there twiddling our thumbs and watch as you take control of the hallways, and cap the point? You'd like that, huh? Just get your own über and come rape our sentries, for fuck's sake, and don't whine about us doing our goddamn job well.
But yeah, someone's always the sore loser.

So the map changed, we were in Dustbowl, defending, and suddenly some guy tells Slaverstrike to GTFO because his ping is too high. Apparently Slaver kept headshotting the guy through walls. And for the record, Slaver's ping is about the same as mine, 130-150.
And he wouldn't shut up about it. And I raged so hard, almost telling him to shut the fuck up (sure, I get defensive about my friends, don't fuck with them). Instead I kept on owning him with the bonesaw (I was playing as Medic, and he was too. Kept losing the melee duels, poor thing), and waiting him to tell me to leave because I was bonesawing him through walls or some shit. And it felt good to own him fair and square in melee and return to my team, sporting a full charge. Ha.
I don't know if servers compensate for lag, but do you have any idea how the lag works? ~140 ping is not that high. I myself don't notice any freaking difference when I play with 140 ping and when I play with 20 ping. I don't know how much others need to compensate to kill me (but do tell if you've played against me when I'm lagging. All I know is that with over 300 latencies it becomes a fucking job to kill the player who's lagging because they're just twitching all over the place), and since I don't play as high-accuracy classes such as the Sniper, I have no idea how much I would have to compensate to get a clean headshot. My little brother says he needs to shoot just a little bit in advance, so I'm gonna trust him, and figure that it takes some skill to be a good Sniper when you are lagging slightly.
But the point is, 140 ping is not high. Sure it's unacceptable in competitive play, but this is a freaking public server! Which of course gives you the right to whine about every single thing.
I wasn't the only one irked by the guy's whining: someone on his team said after a while that Slaver just got him with a clean headshot, he can't be lagging.
And if I remember correctly, there was a player with ~400 ping, and the guy never whined about him, which kinda proves my point on why's the real reason he was being an asshat. Sigh. Way to get butthurt about getting headshot by a good Sniper. Face it, there are better players than you. Stop whining about it like a little kid (...unless you are a little kid, and still it doesn't entitle you to anything).
Also, it's not a fucking dial-up, you do realise that people from other countries might be playing the game? We're on the other side of the fucking globe, of course our ping is higher.

And the grande finale, the final whine before we capped the last point on Dustbowl and I called it quits for the night: someone said "These pro players need to go play on the advanced server."
At that point me and Slaver were at the top of the scoreboard as a Medic and a Demo with over 100 points (...I think no other player on either team had over 100 points, but truth to be told I think we were kinda steamrolling by ourselves...), so I guess he was talking about us. Oh wow. Whoops?
Honestly, I was just kinda flattered. I've never been called a pro before. Haha. So do I need to find a clan now? I did feel a bit bad since I don't want to seem like an asshole who comes to play on a "noob server" to get easy points and point and laugh at players who are not as skilled as I am. Because that's not the case.

I've actually never played on the Newbies Only Advanced server, to be honest. I still think I'm not that good and I'm afraid I'd just end up getting steamrolled. I like playing with the "newbies" because the skill level is somewhat on par with mine. Except that, uh, yeah, I'm often on top of the scoreboard which might indicate that I'm better than others, and... I don't know! I still get killed very easily, even if I do get lots of points! Besides I don't know if my teamwork is good enough. Sure I keep talking about the importance of teamwork, and I try to be a good team player, but I have no idea if I really am.

And since I mentioned finding a clan to play in... I think I need to make clear that I am so joking, and I'm not interested at clan faggotry at all. Sure I've toyed with the idea of finding and joining a clan and trying out competitive playing, but then I realise that I don't want to do competitive gaming, I just want to play for fun.
Besides I would probably have to join a Finnish clan because of latency issues, and I'm horribly prejudiced against Finnish players. Guys especially. And although I just said that any male gamer with half a brain realises that girls too play FPS, I think it might be a whole different issue in competitive gaming. I don't know! I don't know if there are many girls in TF2 clans in Finland!
But I would sure love to see how an easy-going yet somewhat serious local clan would accept a girl as a member, but I don't think I have it in me. Because I'm not that good.
And I'm still too scared to communicate, so.
And the number one reason I don't want to join any clan, is that I don't want any clan tags ruining my name, haha. I would love to show my support for HK Central with the community tag, but aargh I hate wearing tags! I want to be Chrome, just Chrome, not [Clanfag]Chrome! (Sure it would help with identification, I'm sure there are quite a few Chromes on Steam, but my identification is my avatar: you'll know it's me. And the regulars on the servers I play on probably recognise me anyhow, so).

Lots of rage today. I just have zero tolerance for asshattery and general stupidity.

I'd love to show you some screenshots but alas, they're on my little brother's computer.

Oh, Soldier...

Forget everything I whined about the Soldier, turns out I can still play as one, and do pretty good. Yeah, sure, I suicide more often than not if a Pyro charges right at me, and it pisses me off, but... oh well. At least I'm somewhat more conscious about Pyros now.
Also did probably the most awesome kill I've ever done on Badlands. There was an enemy Demo trying to cap their spire back, and I was just getting out of respawn. So just before the point was capped, I rocketjumped from the ledge, fired a rocket at the Demo while I was still airborne, and landed right in the middle of the cap point just as the Demo exploded into gibs. And I got a domination out of it, because I had killed the player before while he was still playing as a Spy. I'd love to show you a screenshot, but my F5-fu was too slow and I only got a screenshot in which I've already landed and there are giblets everywhere. Besides, the said screenshot is on my little brother's computer. But I'll show it to you once I get my hands on it.
Anyway, I just couldn't stop grinning after that. And a mere moment later the round ended, we won, and I was the number one MVP.
So much about not being able to play as Soldier anymore. Sorry about whining, Soldier, I think I still love you, even with all the nerfing and everything.
I should learn to use the shotgun, though. I don't know why I can use the shotgun as a Pyro, no problem, but as a Soldier I use the shotgun very rarely, if ever.
And godDAMN I hate skilled Pyros who can already use the airburst like it's always been there.

I also got the Flare Gun for Pyro (I got Weenie Roast, Fire and Forget, Spontaneous Combustion and Firewatch since the last time I wrote), but it doesn't really matter because I like the shotgun so much more, and I'm not going to give it up. Besides, I have a horrible aim, I'm laggy, and I have hard time hitting distant moving targets even as a Soldier, so I probably wouldn't even hit anything with the Flare Gun.

And finally I have hands-on impressions about the Kritzkrieg and the Übersaw.
Kritzkrieg is... well, I'll just have to learn to use it. And find people who I can give the charge to without them just rushing out guns blazing and thinking that they're still invulnerable (which is what I usually do when I'm kritzkrieged...). And I felt pretty stupid kritzkrieging a Backburner-equipped Pyro, but at least the havoc we caused was formidable.
And naturally there was some Heavy player yelling for Medic and after seeing that I was holding the Kritzkrieg, he started whining how Kritzkrieg is completely useless, hey Medic change it to normal medigun, and goddamn I raged. "Your ass is useless," I wanted to say. Don't fucking question what I'm doing. I think I'm a pretty good Medic (and at least the stats don't argue against me: yesterday, whenever I was a Medic, I was on top of the scoreboard. No exceptions.), and I dare to claim that I know what our team needs and when we need it. We were in Granary, pushing for the last point (oh I wonder how we managed to get to the last point with just the "useless" Kritzkrieg! Shut the fuck up if you don't know what I can do, and you weren't there to see how me and a Pyro cleared the entire warehouse a couple of times and capped the point), and yes, there was a sentry, but everyone knows that all it takes is a Demoman or a Soldier to take down any sentries near the last point (if I can do it, any Soldier with half a skill can do it!). There is no need for the regular über: the Kritzkrieg, if used well, can make more of a difference by killing every single player guarding the point, after which the sentry is left unattended.
So if you get killed just because I didn't have the über to give to you, fuck off. What makes you think I would've übered you anyhow? Heavies are useless against tanked sentries in the distance, I would've much rather picked a Demoman to do the job.

But yeah, I totally admit that Kritzkrieg is useless in some situations. When there are a lot of sentries (I wouldn't use the Kritzkrieg if we're attacking on Dustbowl - at least), sure, I'd pick the regular medigun. You just have to know when and how to use it. Which I'm planning to learn. And it's not that I can't change weapons during respawn if the situation changes so that it isn't favourable to use the Kritzkrieg anymore. And I think a team with two Medics one of which is holding the Kritzkrieg and the other the regular medigun, can be extremely successful.

And the Übersaw? Less-than-three. I tend to forget all the time that hitting with it once charges the übercharge meter by 25%, so I was mighty surprised after killing a Spy with it and then sporting a full charge, even after I had just übered a mere moment ago. Lolwut. I might have to learn to melée a bit better, I usually attack with the Blutsauger. Which keeps even those monstrous Pyros at bay and it's wonderful. <3

I even got a max übercharges record yesterday; managed to stay alive during an entire Gravel Pit round (if my team can hold B, I can usually stay alive for the entire round - and keep most of my team alive as well) and launched five übers during that time. I have to thank our Engineers for that, though, a dispenser on the point saved my life so many times (since I was the only Medic in the team). Damn flame damage drop-off removal. Nothing's more awesome than seeing your life drop close to zero and reaching a dispenser when it's down to six or so. Ehh.

And people, if you got headshot yesterday by me and I was doing the kukri taunt in the deathcam, it was not me. Little brother was on a roll in Granary, and taunted after every single kill he got. He even had the nerve to do it while in flames and about to die. I know I'd be raging my head off: I hate good Snipers, and I hate it when people taunt after they've killed me.
But seeing someone else ("me") do it, was priceless. I was laughing my ass off. And the kukri taunt is so priceless, oh god... I hope people at least got nice deathcam shots outta those taunts.
The only thing I'm trying to stop my little brother from doing, is using teleporters. He seems to be a compulsive teleport-user, whenever he sees one, he just gets on it and I try to stop him because for fuck's sake, Snipers don't use teleporters. D:
And since no one knows that Sniper-Chrome is not me, well... everyone must think that I'm an asshole Sniper. Yay? Maybe I should get him to change his nick when he's playing (I would've made him do it already, but I can't remember the console command, and I never remember to look it up). To avoid confusion. And to stop people from thinking that I'm a complete asshole and actually a pretty good Sniper (he was called a "monster" a few days ago and told to GTFO of the "newbie" server. The whiner probably wasn't a regular...).

More achievement stuff and general ranting

Oh, yeah, I'm just gonna add one little thing to that last entry: the number one reason for why I won't farm any achievements, even if it costs me the Übersaw.

I don't want to screw up my stats. I like looking at my stats and it's great to feel like I've actually got better every time I break my previous record for kills or healing or longest life or something. So if I suddenly have the highest life measuring in hours and max kills of fifty or something... that would suck. Then I would never again feel like I've got any better.
And yeah, I'm a total stats whore (if you haven't noticed!), I stare at my own stats waaay too often. The stats parser is my best friend. So I don't want to ruin that for me.

I know there's a lot of whining going on about the new weapon unlockables being tied to achievements that basically promote "acting like an idiot" and thus ruining the game for others. With that in mind I am kinda starting to resent Valve's decision to handle the unlockables this way... don't get me wrong, I don't mind the weapons being tied to achievements (and I like getting achievements, I think it's fun), it's just that some of the achievements are, face it, pretty stupid.
Yesterday was probably the first time I actually saw a Medic act like a total idiot. He didn't ruin things for the rest of us (we had two capable Medics to balance him out, but still we were basically playing 11 to 12), but it was still kinda annoying trying to yell for a heal and this idiot just kept trying to kill people and taunt.
Note to self: do not try to get Autopsy Report in the heat of a battle.
Then again, I did something that constitutes as "acting like an idiot" yesterday too, but uh, it kinda had nothing to do with the achievements. I was just being an idiot on my own accord. I DID get some progress for Peer Review for it, but now that I think about it, I have no idea what the hell was going through my mind then. So, Gold Rush, first stage, final checkpoint. I was defending, and I get out of the respawn and saw an übered Demo rushing towards me and up the stairs to get on top of our respawn building. So I followed. And bonesawed the Medic. And felt really good about myself, until I heard "the cart is nearing the checkpoint!" and got killed just in time to spectate as BLU wins the round. Ehhhh. So I could've been there to keep our Soldiers and Demos going instead of chasing down a Demo-Medic combo who were apparently trying to take down our Snipers. A horrible miscalculation on my part. This is why I don't go combat Medic on Gold Rush or Dustbowl or Gravel Pit. I always have better things to do than kill someone.

But yeah, I was about to say that sure, some of the achievements basically tell you to fuck teamwork and be a drag to your team, but face it: some of the achievements cause the exact opposite. Some of the achievements actually make you a good Medic.
For example, Grand Rounds. I see far too many Medics sticking to that one Heavy like they're Siamese twins or something, and nothing annoys me more than trying to get a heal and the Medic is basically glued to some other dude. Especially if I'm playing as Medic too.
Infernal Medicine. I got it yesterday (hee, I got it when I extinguished Slaverstrike), and that really didn't take very long to get.
But both of those achievements made me do my job a little bit better: I tried to heal everyone calling for Medic (except when my primary target was under heavy fire and I deemed it would be more useful to keep him alive than to fuck him and go heal the lone Soldier in the other side of the map - besides, another Medic would probably get him before I do), and I also tried to extinguish everyone whenever they were on fire. Especially other Medics.
And oh yeah, I'm 11 heals away from getting Grand Rounds, so consider that one done.
And First Do No Harm promotes being a good Medic and doing your job (and I find it extremely amusing how most of the people who have farmed achievements don't have this. HAR HAR). As well as Trauma Queen and Group Health and Double Blind Trial and Intern and Ubi Concordia, Ibi Victoria, which are just basically doing what Medics are supposed to do. Big Pharma and Specialist are taking it a bit overboard, but at least trying to get them teaches you to survive and stay alive and keep your healing target(s) alive. Which is what I should be practicing.

So stop whining about the achievements. If you can't get some of them by playing normally, I have to think that you're a rotten Medic, and thus should go back to playing Soldier and stop feeling butthurt about not getting everything on a golden platter. What the hell would you do with Medic weapons if you don't even play that much as Medic?! You having the Kritzkrieg would mean just one idiot Medic more who just doesn't know when to use it!
I know I won't be getting any Demoman or Scout unlockables once they come out, and whine about the achievements being hard. Because I don't play as Demo or Scout. I don't care. Why should you? No wonder you whine about the MMORPG grinding aspects, you are the one making it a matter of grinding.

Also I don't know what everyone's whining about "too many Medics on every server," because I'm playing on public servers and only remember having an overabundance of Medics on two or three different occassions (okay, last night we started a 12 on 12 match on Dustbowl with only Soldiers and Medics in our team. THAT was horrible. I was a Soldier, btw, and got the only Medic with the Kritzkrieg, hee hee). Change servers, kthxbai, it's not that hard! Or talk to the admin about restricting the amount of Medics to the max of two or three.

Rant rant rant. Okay. I'm just getting so tired of basement-dwelling fanboys whining about every single thing. Yes, I do get the irony. Except that I'm not a basement-dwelling fanboy. Sry2say.

And what IS it with these jealous Medics?! Okay, I get it, you want in on the fun and our Heavy buddy is on top of the scoreboard, but Jesus Christ why do you stick to the same guy I'm sticking to, while there are people yelling for Medic in the direction from where you came from?! Sure, I don't mind, you can have the Heavy and I'll go heal the others, but WHOA. First come first serve, I think.
(Btw, if it's points you're after, you get so much more from actual healing than those precious assists, just sayin'.)
And for fuck's sake, Medic, don't heal the same guy I'm healing during the setup! Goddamn these noobs (or idiots, whatever) are starting to get to me.

Sorry, I'm talking a lot about Medics these days. I could tell you about how absolutely fucking scared I am of (good) Snipers, and how I should be playing more as Pyro now that there are Medics everywhere (I did it yesterday on Well and HEE HEE burning Medic flesh, everywhere), but I'll save those stories for later. I think I'm coming to a stop with the achievements pretty soon, so I'll have to come up with something else to talk about.