Oh, Soldier...

Forget everything I whined about the Soldier, turns out I can still play as one, and do pretty good. Yeah, sure, I suicide more often than not if a Pyro charges right at me, and it pisses me off, but... oh well. At least I'm somewhat more conscious about Pyros now.
Also did probably the most awesome kill I've ever done on Badlands. There was an enemy Demo trying to cap their spire back, and I was just getting out of respawn. So just before the point was capped, I rocketjumped from the ledge, fired a rocket at the Demo while I was still airborne, and landed right in the middle of the cap point just as the Demo exploded into gibs. And I got a domination out of it, because I had killed the player before while he was still playing as a Spy. I'd love to show you a screenshot, but my F5-fu was too slow and I only got a screenshot in which I've already landed and there are giblets everywhere. Besides, the said screenshot is on my little brother's computer. But I'll show it to you once I get my hands on it.
Anyway, I just couldn't stop grinning after that. And a mere moment later the round ended, we won, and I was the number one MVP.
So much about not being able to play as Soldier anymore. Sorry about whining, Soldier, I think I still love you, even with all the nerfing and everything.
I should learn to use the shotgun, though. I don't know why I can use the shotgun as a Pyro, no problem, but as a Soldier I use the shotgun very rarely, if ever.
And godDAMN I hate skilled Pyros who can already use the airburst like it's always been there.

I also got the Flare Gun for Pyro (I got Weenie Roast, Fire and Forget, Spontaneous Combustion and Firewatch since the last time I wrote), but it doesn't really matter because I like the shotgun so much more, and I'm not going to give it up. Besides, I have a horrible aim, I'm laggy, and I have hard time hitting distant moving targets even as a Soldier, so I probably wouldn't even hit anything with the Flare Gun.

And finally I have hands-on impressions about the Kritzkrieg and the Übersaw.
Kritzkrieg is... well, I'll just have to learn to use it. And find people who I can give the charge to without them just rushing out guns blazing and thinking that they're still invulnerable (which is what I usually do when I'm kritzkrieged...). And I felt pretty stupid kritzkrieging a Backburner-equipped Pyro, but at least the havoc we caused was formidable.
And naturally there was some Heavy player yelling for Medic and after seeing that I was holding the Kritzkrieg, he started whining how Kritzkrieg is completely useless, hey Medic change it to normal medigun, and goddamn I raged. "Your ass is useless," I wanted to say. Don't fucking question what I'm doing. I think I'm a pretty good Medic (and at least the stats don't argue against me: yesterday, whenever I was a Medic, I was on top of the scoreboard. No exceptions.), and I dare to claim that I know what our team needs and when we need it. We were in Granary, pushing for the last point (oh I wonder how we managed to get to the last point with just the "useless" Kritzkrieg! Shut the fuck up if you don't know what I can do, and you weren't there to see how me and a Pyro cleared the entire warehouse a couple of times and capped the point), and yes, there was a sentry, but everyone knows that all it takes is a Demoman or a Soldier to take down any sentries near the last point (if I can do it, any Soldier with half a skill can do it!). There is no need for the regular über: the Kritzkrieg, if used well, can make more of a difference by killing every single player guarding the point, after which the sentry is left unattended.
So if you get killed just because I didn't have the über to give to you, fuck off. What makes you think I would've übered you anyhow? Heavies are useless against tanked sentries in the distance, I would've much rather picked a Demoman to do the job.

But yeah, I totally admit that Kritzkrieg is useless in some situations. When there are a lot of sentries (I wouldn't use the Kritzkrieg if we're attacking on Dustbowl - at least), sure, I'd pick the regular medigun. You just have to know when and how to use it. Which I'm planning to learn. And it's not that I can't change weapons during respawn if the situation changes so that it isn't favourable to use the Kritzkrieg anymore. And I think a team with two Medics one of which is holding the Kritzkrieg and the other the regular medigun, can be extremely successful.

And the Übersaw? Less-than-three. I tend to forget all the time that hitting with it once charges the übercharge meter by 25%, so I was mighty surprised after killing a Spy with it and then sporting a full charge, even after I had just übered a mere moment ago. Lolwut. I might have to learn to melée a bit better, I usually attack with the Blutsauger. Which keeps even those monstrous Pyros at bay and it's wonderful. <3

I even got a max übercharges record yesterday; managed to stay alive during an entire Gravel Pit round (if my team can hold B, I can usually stay alive for the entire round - and keep most of my team alive as well) and launched five übers during that time. I have to thank our Engineers for that, though, a dispenser on the point saved my life so many times (since I was the only Medic in the team). Damn flame damage drop-off removal. Nothing's more awesome than seeing your life drop close to zero and reaching a dispenser when it's down to six or so. Ehh.

And people, if you got headshot yesterday by me and I was doing the kukri taunt in the deathcam, it was not me. Little brother was on a roll in Granary, and taunted after every single kill he got. He even had the nerve to do it while in flames and about to die. I know I'd be raging my head off: I hate good Snipers, and I hate it when people taunt after they've killed me.
But seeing someone else ("me") do it, was priceless. I was laughing my ass off. And the kukri taunt is so priceless, oh god... I hope people at least got nice deathcam shots outta those taunts.
The only thing I'm trying to stop my little brother from doing, is using teleporters. He seems to be a compulsive teleport-user, whenever he sees one, he just gets on it and I try to stop him because for fuck's sake, Snipers don't use teleporters. D:
And since no one knows that Sniper-Chrome is not me, well... everyone must think that I'm an asshole Sniper. Yay? Maybe I should get him to change his nick when he's playing (I would've made him do it already, but I can't remember the console command, and I never remember to look it up). To avoid confusion. And to stop people from thinking that I'm a complete asshole and actually a pretty good Sniper (he was called a "monster" a few days ago and told to GTFO of the "newbie" server. The whiner probably wasn't a regular...).

Goldrush!

So. Right.

Goldrush?

Is love.

I'm absolutely loving the map. I'm still pretty lost on it, I haven't even been to every hallway or used every route, and more often than not I find myself going the wrong damn way. Huge map is huge. The first time I was defending on third stage I ran in circles for the entire setup. I left the respawn, had a Medic stick to me, and a few seconds later I found myself BACK in the final checkpoint area and went completely WTF (I suppose there's a shortcut, just like in Dustbowl's stage three? I followed everyone there, but then turned the wrong way and ended up back in our respawn). And the poor Medic was clinging to me the entire time, haha. I was sure he was going wtf is that goddamn Soldier doing, is he lost or what. Didn't leave me, though. (That Medic was a mystery: he kept sticking to me although I was lost half the time and I wasted a few of his übers, and yet he STILL kept giving them to me). Then I followed the tracks (thank GOD for the tracks) and found my way to the cart after BLU had already capped it, heh.
But yeah, I've only played like four games on Goldrush, and most of the time haven't gotten through second stage. And I've never seen BLU actually win, the third stage's final checkpoint favours defense immensely. It was IMPOSSIBLE to get around the last corner after our offense broke. And it was very easy not to let BLU get through when we were defending, although we won with the cart being inches away from the final checkpoint, heh.
Also I don't understand how captures work on Goldrush. Are the stats broken or something, or do you REALLY get a capture each time you get to the cart and make it move? Not only on checkpoints? I was suddenly getting like five captures/life and was pretty surprised because of it.
The map also seems to be buggy as hell. I don't know if it was the map or what, but I got pretty disoriented at one point when the teams changed and my HUD remained RED even though I was in BLU. And when I got übered, I was glowing red. My crits were red. So most of the time I was firing at my own teammates and getting killed because I kept ignoring the REDs. And I was also pretty drunk at that point, which naturally added to the confusion. Ouch.

And, oh, one of the best parts about the map? The way the announcer goes totally fucking insane on third stage when the bomb is nearing the final checkpoint. Her laugh is priceless. I couldn't stop laughing the first time I heard it.

I was playing Soldier like I said I would be, changed to Medic only once to get the Chief of Staff achievement (I have over 1,5 million healed, so all I had to do was to change to Medic, get the medigun out, and I got the achievement), and so I can't really talk about the unlockables or achievements yet.
I can talk about them from an outsiders' point of view, though, so here we go: there were actually not that many Medics running around. Four was a constant amount, sometimes there were more and sometimes less (I was on a 24 player server), but I didn't even once have TOO MANY Medics in my team.
And goddamn, yes, I had a harem at times. Hee.
I saw quite a lot of Blutsaugers already. They're not really terrifying, but damn it if I don't want one. There were a few Kritzkriegs (of which I will talk about in a moment), and I even got killed by an Übersaw at one point. I also saw people use the damn console command. A player enters, we get announcements of the said player getting the three milestone achievements, and then he was running around with the Übersaw. Thank god Valve already removed the commands, and I'm seriously hoping they'd find a way to roll back the achievements/weapons that people have got by cheating. I believe it's easier to root out those who have the weapons but don't have any other achievements but the milestones. I'm not bitter, I just think that cheating like that is pretty damn low.

But yes. The Kritzkrieg.
As a Soldier? The Kritzkrieg's THE MOST AWESOME THING EVER FUCK YES. I was defending in Dustbowl stage three when I had a Medic with the Kritzkrieg stick to me, and in mere moments: CRIT ROCKETS. EVERYWHERE. Holy fuck I almost came, that's how awesome it was. I saw enemies starting to scatter in panic once they saw the crits, but there was nothing they could do, because even the splash damage was killing people, and oh god it was A THING OF BEAUTY.
After that, whenever there was a Medic with the Kritzkrieg healing me, I actually started paying attention to them and trying to keep them safe, because yeah, I will do anything to get the charge given to me. I'm a total crit junkie, yes, but dammit, you've got a streak a lucky crits before, right? You know how great it feels? How about ten fucking seconds worth of crits?
YEAH.
IT'S THAT GOOD.
Also, the Kritzkrieg is the most terrible thing ever in the hands of your enemies. A Kritzkrieged Pyro charging right at you? I literally panicked. A skillful Soldier with a ten second crit streak? Fucking terrifying. A Heavy? Even from a significant distance that's gonna HURT. A DEMOMAN? FUCKING EVER-LASTING CRIT STICKIES FGSFDS. A melée combat Medic way too close for comfort? Fuck this shit I'm outta here. As in, goodbye cruel world.
The horror of being face to face with a Kritzkrieged enemy is enough to make you forget that they're not in fact immortal. I didn't even once fire at them, I just RAN and tried to hide, resulting in getting killed.

And then some interesting little observations from yesterday.
So, I am usually playing on "Newbies Only" servers. Not because I'm a noob (the regulars over there are seriously not noobs on any scale), but because I've got to used to playing there. The atmosphere is accommodating, there are no horrible assholes, and all the regulars are pretty nice. Plus they're vanilla servers with only the official maps in rotation. And truth to be told, the skill level of other players is on par with mine, that is to say that I don't get my ass completely kicked all the time, and when I have a good day I'm often topping the scoreboard. The lack of teamwork every now and then pisses me off, of course, but that's what you get from playing on a public server. And I can live with that. I rage, but I can live with it. Heh. The only downside is that I've always played with a ~150 ping, but I've got used to it and I'm doing pretty fine with a high latency like that, so I'm not complaining. At least 150 isn't completely insane.
Anyway, yesterday I was playing on a totally random server. I just randomly picked one from the list, requirements being "vanilla," "24/7 Goldrush," and "an agreeable latency (ie. under 200)." Ended up on a 24/7 Dustbowl/Goldrush server (because you know how much I love Dustbowl), with a latency of 20 or so.
I was quite sure I'd end up being steamrolled because I've been playing with "noobs," and I have NO IDEA how my playing skills match with people who supposedly are not newbies. But I steeled myself and thought that I'd just change servers if that ends up being the case. Or suck it up and try my best.

So as it happens, I'm not being steamrolled at all. Quite the opposite. After the first game in Goldrush I was there in the middle of the scoreboard. But after that, Dustbowl, and I'm topping the scoreboard. For the entire goddamn game.
And I was drinking. So I was at least a bit tipsy, if not outright drunk.
Sure, part of it could be the latency, maybe the other players weren't that great (but I, uh, was dominating all the team-stacking clan players in the enemy team...) or whatever, but it doesn't change the fact that I was fucking owning.
After that round I was on top of the scoreboard even in Goldrush (and I wasn't even familiar with the map yet!), and kept wondering what kind of super Soldier do I turn out to be whenever I've been drinking. Haha.
And like I told you, every other player was NOT a Medic. And I had Medics stick to me, but not all the time.
Here, have a scoreboard screenshot, so you can see I'm not making this shit up:


Yeah.

Anyway. I'm going to play some more Goldrush now. I still have a bottle of wine, so I'll probably find myself going fatty at some point (Medic harem, I want one). Or maybe I'll go Medic and aim to übering Scouts and getting the "assist in bonking three enemies" achievement. Hehee.

Breaking scores!

I have no idea if I'm any good as Soldier or am I just ridiculously lucky.
I don't spam anymore, and I've noticed how I'm starting to calculate the opponents' possible movements and firing rockets accordingly. So at least I'm getting better, that's for sure.

But take today, for instance: first few maps I absolutely suck. I can't hit anything, I get killed by Pyros (yes, Pyros are still my archnemesis. If you really want to kill me when I'm Soldier, go Pyro and run straight at me. Then laugh at how I succumb to your flames like a Spy), I get killed by anything that's shot at my general direction. And the enemy team wasn't even too overpowered: we were doing quite well.
I suck and I refuse to change classes, because I'M SERIOUSLY NOT THIS HORRIBLE AT THIS, LEMME TRY THAT AGAIN.
Then again, maybe I was just having a bad day. Spies were completely raping me whenever I went Engie (they were good Spies, I admit, because bad ones don't cause me much grief) and this one Scout brat (seriously, the player was a kid, he used a mic. And to me all children are annoying and obnoxious, so excuse me. How do I mute?) kept owning me. Goddamn there's nothing as annoying as someone probably almost fifteen years my junior playing the one class that Engineers usually dominate easily, just effortlessly owning my ass whenever he stumbles by.
He was really good, I give him that.
And there is magic again in Granary, because for some reason I was on top of the scoreboard there. As Soldier. And our team didn't suck, it was actually a pretty damn good team (we didn't win, but it's because the enemy team was even better, duh). But for some reason Granary is my Soldier playground, I always do well there. Strangely enough.
Wasn't a completely rotten Medic when I went one, but oh well. Even racked up some kills in Gravel Pit. Two kills within few seconds: ASSAULT MEDIC. I absolutely hate all them badass Medics, because it's always kinda embarrassing to get killed by syringes. It's completely awesome when I do it, naturally.
And before you ask, for me ze healing comes before ze hurting: I rarely attack as a Medic. Only when I'm cornered or alone (because seriously I ALWAYS have better things to do than kill someone: except when there is no one else around and that goddamn Pyro is heading for our intel), when I KNOW I can get the kill, or when it's a Spy.
But yeah, I've clocked about 33 hours as a Medic, and my kill count is maybe a hundred, so I really don't do much killing when I'm Medic.

But then. Suddenly, I am a kickass Soldier.
It all began when I once again managed to jump on top of cap B in Gravel Pit just as some übered enemy ensemble was rushing the point, so I finally got to cause suffering by firing rockets from the windows at the adorably unaware enemies standing on the point. Aww three defenses. I ran out of ammo pretty fast since I didn't have a dispenser handy, but at least I managed to thwart one of their capture attempts.

Then. Dustbowl. RED. Stage Two. I managed to stay alive from the capping of the first point to the end of the round. Which ended in our victory. I didn't even think about it, but I kept running all around the place, had one Medic healing my ass whenever I was in need (he didn't stick to me, which I think was a good thing, because when I have a Medic I have this tendency to be a bit braver, which usually ends in a gruesome death. YEAH STICKIES ON THE FLOOR WHO CARES 8D and then "boom!"), and if he was not close by, I returned to the nearest dispenser for health and ammo. We kept the enemies pretty far from the point, they didn't really get through the tunnels.
The result?
20 points in one life. 20 fucking points in one life. That's like... I almost spewed my tea all over the monitor when the next round started and "You had more kills as Soldier that round than your previous best - 16" announcement popped up. I hadn't even thought about it! Came as a complete surprise! I kinda realised I stayed alive for a very long time (like I've told you, I die a lot, and I die fast), but I had no idea the whole round was THAT successful! I thought I had maybe gotten eight or so kills.
So, 16 kills, 2 dominations, I'm not quite sure were the rest two points destructions or assists, but who cares. Also damage dealt record and longest life.

Now my Soldier stats don't look so pathetic anymore! My best score before was 9 (which is kinda really pathetic since I've played so much as Soldier. 30 hours, eh. But look at the bright side! At least the thirty hours have taught me something!).
And yeah, it's my best overall score, Medic and Engineer come next with 16 points. Go check my Steam ID if you wanna see more of my stats, no use talking about them when you can just see them for yourself.

Yes, I am aware that the scores don't really matter, but we've gone over this a few times already, so let's just skip it this time.

Also I had no idea how much I would actually end up enjoying playing as Soldier.

And I don't even remember when's the last time I was so embarrassed by something: I was playing in Dustbowl, I was in RED, and we were getting our asses properly kicked by BLU. People were whining how the team sucks and we WERE pretty bad, I admit.
Then Steam kicked me, for some reason or another, and I had to reconnect to the server. So I'm in the team selection screen, the teams have an even number of players and I'm thinking that I'm still gonna go RED because I would have to try to make a difference and come on, it would be simply HORRIBLE to go BLU since they've been owning us.
And then I ACCIDENTALLY CLICK THE BLU DOOR. D: I got in, so I chose a class and quickly returned to the team selection screen because I AM NOT GOING TO DO THIS OH MY GOD, and I see as someone else enters RED and I can't change teams anymore.
I was so embarrassed. I was hoping RED would be able to defend (this was Stage Three) and we would lose because oh my god. Every time someone killed me I kept thinking what they must think of me, how I'm a sore loser and oh god, I totally deserved that crit 'nade or whatever.
We didn't get the last point, so at least justice was served. To me, anyhow.
(It also wasn't a surprise why BLU was so superior: they communicated really well.)
What makes it even more embarrassing, is because I always get really angry when autobalance hits, some poor sod is tranferred to the losing team, and they immediately disconnect and try to get back into their old team. I think it's probably the lamest thing ever. Way to take the game a bit too seriously, dipshit!
And yeah, I hate it too when autobalance hits, but I would NEVER disconnect and try to join my old team. Take the epic Dustbowl match a few days back, when I got switched to RED. I was annoyed, but I just sucked it up and started killing my old team mates. And I ended up having so much fun and actually winning, so.

I also have my own headset now, but I still chicken out of actually using it.
And "comfortable to wear over long periods" my ass, I wore it for five hours and now my ears hurt like sons of bitches. It's also not very practical with glasses, stupid neckband. But! It's got good-enough sound and the mic works, so I'm not going to whine. A lot.
Now if I could just get over the fact that I sound like an idiot, and actually use the thing. I speak very good English, damn it, but when I get nervous I start stuttering and my otherwise so normal (albeit probably strange to native speakers) accent turns into this stiff Finnish accent and I pronounce words all wrong and ouch.

:D

The Soldier nerf: excellent thing.

Played for a while just now, and of course I went Soldier to experience the Power of Nerfing by myself. Of course, the first fifteen minutes I did nothing but whine about it. I was playing on Gravel Pit, and I don't even know where the ammo pickups are located there (since I usually go Medic on Gravel Pit and so I only know the whereabouts of health pickups), so I ended up scavenging enemies' dropped weapons. 20 rockets is so few. Especially when I'm used to having 40 and hardly ever running out of ammo.
But after I got used to it (got used to setting off to find ammo after a few fired rounds, and not spamming like a nutcase) I realised how brilliant the whole thing is.
Because it really made me stop the senseless spamming.

And I didn't get any worse. Actually it would seem that I got better. :D Broke my damage dealt and destruction records on Dustbowl after the Gravel Pit match. Did a PERFECT capture on Stage One Cap B: charged in through the one-way gate with a Medic who then proceeded to übering me, we took down the two sentries guarding the point, rushed in and capped it. After that I managed to stay alive on Stage Two Cap B for an uncharacteristically long time (I die a lot, and I die fast), taking down sentries and killing the people guarding the point, always rushing back to the building to get more ammo when I was running low. Broke my damage dealt record then, and probably came close to my point record too, because I was killing people left and right, even dominated some poor sod.

Too bad that the game crashed not long after we capped the point (with just thirty seconds left in the timer, whoa) and proceeded to Stage Three, and the new records didn't seem to go to my stats. Hmph. Yeah, I'm playing on my little brother's computer atm. It's old and crappy and paged pool memory problems make the game crash constantly. I've tried to get rid of them, but it still crashes after some time and nothing seems to help.

And my achievements are really broken. I got a progress announcement after the Gravel Pit match that I was 7/9 through Head of the Class and WHAT THE FUCK. I have no idea what classes are not included to that! Seriously, Steam, what's your fucking problem? I was 8/9 through and I thought I was only missing Heavy (because like I told you, for some reason the game didn't wanna include it to the count), and now I'm 7/9. And I apparently didn't have Soldier. Which I had for certain, because Soldier's been my mostly played class during the last two weeks!
Not the first time either: back in the day I got Heavy through some kinda glitch (changed to Heavy in the end of some Dustbowl match, came out of the respawn, died instantly, and enemies capped the point while I was waiting for respawn. And it included Heavy to the Head of the Class and I was like wtf), and then some time later the entire count went back to zero. I suspected it was because of the whole thing with the Heavy, so didn't think about it too much. Anyway, I had to play all the classes again, and got to the point where I am now. And now I'm CERTAIN I got all the classes by playing a complete round with each, so I have no idea why I'm now 7/9 instead of 8/9 like I used to be! Sigh.
This sucks. How can one goddamn achievement be such a pain in the ass? And I thought Impossible Defense would be hard to get!

Ah, and The Slowest Medic Ever story that crossed my mind earlier today, and I thought of sharing: a few days ago I was defending on Gravel Pit. I was a Soldier, and I had a Medic sticking to me. We were heading for Cap A, and there was a huge battle going on. I spotted a Spy cloaking nearby and with all the chaos I lost my Medic (probably wandered off to get a medkit).
And the next time I see the Medic, on the other side of the Cap A area, he's healing a Soldier. With my name. I can understand his confusion, but what the hell, Medic.
I of course start firing rockets at the Spy, who just keeps running in circles and I look at the Medic, who's still sticking to the Spy and healing his ass and just standing there like a bloody idiot while I keep spamming rockets at them. Slowest Medic EVER. It was kinda cute, really. Eventually, like a few seconds later the Medic realises that something's wrong and whips out his syringe gun and starts shooting the Spy, but goddamn.
That was one of the moments when I wished I had a headset. Could've told the poor slow Medic that he's healing a Spy. (I SHOULD get a headset because it would make communicating so much easier, but I'm still not too happy about the fact that you never know what kinda shit people pull off when they hear a girl speaking over the voicechat).
I don't know what was up with that Spy either, I didn't see him making a move to backstab the Medic, although he was just standing there, completely clueless of what's happening. I would've just cloaked and got the hell outta there if the guy with my name turned up and started shooting me, but that's just me. :D And yeah, I would've tried to get that Medic first.

Yeah, I'm off to fight more with the paged pool memory problems, maybe I could get the game run for longer than an hour. I need my daily dose of TF2, neeeeed.